Thread: Assistance!

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  1. #1 Assistance! 
    Kanketsu
    JacobiYounger's Avatar
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    I am writing this for my valentine. We have been talking for quite some time now. She wanted me to write a sonnet a long time ago, but I have never written one till today.
    This took me actually a fair bit of time to do. I just want you guys to look over it and see if there is anything I can improve on or change.

    Thanks!
    Code:
    I noticed you from the beginning,
    We had met for the first time
    I was itching to start singing,
    For your name is like a rhyme. 
    
    We talk to each other each day,
    And I wish it would ever end
    If only we stopped to play
    I wouldn't ever want to suspend 
    
    It makes me want to start a fight,
    When I see you with him all night
    This took me a long ass time to write,
    So I really hope this is alright.
    
    I wish you would never leave my side.
    Please come back again so I don't cry.
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  2. #2  
    Banned Assistance! Market Banned


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    less sounding like a fag and more using big words she doesn't understand

    good luck my dude
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